The Misapplied Criminal Mind

Image hosted by
Born 1973. Haven't died yet, despite several near-misses.

Doing stuff.
Fiddly things.


<< April 2004 >>
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
 01 02 03
04 05 06 07 08 09 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30

Blog Links
Just some of the great blogs I keep stumbling on. Go for an explore, and if you see any really good ones, let me know...

- the hottest blogger I know.
- I hate knitting. However, I love this blog. Who'd have thought?
- If you ask me, it's perpetual brilliance!
- 'nuff said.
Inspired - inspiring.
- ...into light.
Xenouveau - Her from Sadisticland.
All Geek To Me - Fun from Scout Finch.

The HAL9000 Report - WARNING! - Controversy!

Elven Sarah - Witty and weird, a bit like me (but witty).
Sedgefield - A nice blog, which may have died from meme deficiency...
Lorianne - A great lady had a great blog. Hopefully it returns...
superphase - A stick hero for the masses...
Sadly, we have been given the cold Shoulder.
- a great blog from the continent, nice and warm there.
Selfindulgence - Not indulgent any more.
She Speaks - The star-crossed lover is now silent.
Organic Feminism - A tremendous blog. Even though she calls me Scoots *shudder*
You can no longer get your soup fix from souplover.

The Witches of Elswick
Lair of the Strong Bad - 3D Chat - Sweets

My mood is: The current mood of winstonsmith at

Hits since 28/07/2004:

Blogarama - The Blog Directory

Entries you may have missed
Behold The Freak!!!
Insert Title Here...
Cycling woes.
Happy Easter, etc.
Back Seat Blogger
Remember Sammy Jankiss
Journey from Hell...
I have returned...
My warbly song...
Astral Projection
Tick followed tock...
Another Week

Link Images
If you want to put a little picture on your site linking to this one, then you can use one of these images...

If you use one, try to host it yourself, I can't be certain how long the website will be up...

ŠThe Misapplied Criminal Mind. All rights reserved. No reproduction without permission.

If you want to be updated on this weblog Enter your email here:

rss feed

Friday, April 09, 2004
Cycling woes.

Well, It's Friday, and hopefully enough time has passed for me to remember this weeks cycling events without major post traumatic stress disorder...

I arrived at Manchester Piccadilly, bike in hand, pretty late. I missed my usual train, so I tool the one after. Got on, went to work.

I arrived at Piccadilly on time, went to get on the right train. "You can't bring that bike on here!" The Virgin Trains Gestapo announced. "But that's nonsense!" I said, quite calmly, for me. "Do you have a reservation for it?" They asked. "You have to have a reservation to get a bike on any Virgin Train." Hmmm. Except when there's no-one standing around with nothing to do, evidently.

So I took the bull by the horns, and decided to book the space. I queued up, and by the time I reached the counter, I was pretty annoyed, so I said, "I'd like to book a space for my bike on that train. For the next 6 months." You should have seen her face! It was a picture of shock, and helped me get through the rest of the week. So she starts writing out, by hand, 180 bike reservations. I think to myself, this has to be the stupidest system in rail history, and say, "OK, stop at the end of the month." And then she gets stroppy because I haven't got a ticket past the end of the week! "And you can only book 3 days in advance," she adds. "So you're saying I have to be late for work twice a week?" I ask. She cannot reply. I take my 22 tickets and leave for the platform. The train pulls out, so I return to the queue for another bike reservation, for the train after. I get to work 15 minutes later than normal, upon which everyone asks if my scooter broke down. On the way back, I go to the ticket office and reserve the space. I ask where the bike section is. "Ask the platform staff, they'll be happy to help."
I ask the platform staff, and they say, "You put a bike on. Do you have a reservation?" I nod, and they say, "Well you won't get it on without a reservation." I'm getting mightily annoyed now, and start getting abrupt. The platform staff have to run with me through the pouring rain to open the guards van so I can stow the bike, and then I run across the platform to the regular carriage to sit down. All in a hurry to stop the train being late! As if I care about their timekeeping, whatever time a train comes, it makes me late for something...

Things went well. I got to the platform and asked where the bike section was. "You can't put your bike on here!" they said. "Have you reserved a space?" "Yes I have. Now where's the bike section?" I reply. "At the back." I get the bike in, telling pretty much everyone from Virgin where I'm getting off. I sit down, and tell the ticket inspector where I'm getting off.
We slow down for the station, and I get my bike ready for disembarkation. There is no handle on the door, someone will have to let me out. The doors don't open. I run through the train to the next open door and wave at the staff. Eventually, as they see they're not gonna leave with me hanging out of the door, someone comes to see what I want. "Can you open the door so I can get my bike out?" I ask. "Oh, of course. Sorry, no one told me about it," he lied, as I had told him earlier.
I carry the bike over the bridge, and get on outside the station. Excellent, I think. I'll get to work before 8 for the first time since the crash. I'm wrong. The tyre is monumentally flat, and I have to push it to work. I have no pump to check if it's a flat, and no repair kit if it is.

I push the bike home, no trouble on the trains.

Posted at 06:11 pm by Paul

April 11, 2004   01:11 AM PDT
free for dogs, they're practicaly people lol
April 11, 2004   12:05 AM PDT
do you have to buy a reservation for dogs on trains?

hmm.. i wonder... *smiles*
April 10, 2004   04:05 PM PDT
I'm so happy that I only have to deal with highway traffic!!
April 10, 2004   09:34 AM PDT
Well my dear, looks like you're going to have to get yourself some good running shoes, hmm??? Oh, and by the way, I will *not* be playing "I'll show you mine if you show me yours"! *pinches Win behind the knee* *runs off, cackling wildly*
April 9, 2004   08:09 PM PDT
No Ang, don't get me a car!! I crash em!
April 9, 2004   07:53 PM PDT
I think you are right Winston, "a hidden agenda". Buggars!
April 9, 2004   07:41 PM PDT
If I were rich, I would buy you a car right about now.
April 9, 2004   07:12 PM PDT
They have some hidden agenda to keep bikes off the trains. I'm sure of it.
April 9, 2004   06:49 PM PDT
gosh, i didnt know they have such lousy services... well, hope there wouldnt be too much trouble for you in the future

Leave a Comment:


Homepage (optional)


Previous Entry Home Next Entry